Caw! Caw!

I've got the Hallelujah Chorus ringing in my head. And it's so totally appropriate. It's about freaking time that Megan goes home. And tonight was so off-the-charts uncomfortable that I might've cried if she hadn't left.

What was with the weird dancing and freaky facial expressions and the squawking and the flying?? Is she cracking up?? I'm not sure what other explanation there could be at this point.

She looked almost glad to go. After her little episode of mouthing off to the judges, I was so turned off. After she got booted, when she said she had some things to say, I thought she might just say, "See ya, suckahs!" and invoke the federal broadcast 2-second delay safety mechanism with a hand gesture.

She's ready to go home to her baby. I'm wondering if she might give Alexis, who looked none too pleased to be in the audience, her spot on the tour.

Tonight was WILDLY uncomfortable. From Ryan's manhandling of Scott (again) to the HORRIBLE lip synching to the matching dog tags (what's that about?) to the mics picking up everything the contests were saying and doing to that Lady Gaga performance to the close up on Lady's zipper eye patch to Megan mouthing off to the judges to Megan making weird faces to Megan thinking she's a bird to Megan's swan song (Ha! I get it!).

There were some bright spots:

* Matt's save
* David Cook's performance and award
* The contestants' camaraderie
* Anoop showing some humility
* The dramatic intro to the show to recap yesterday's performances (MAJOR improvement to Ryan's voice overs, Idol Producers)

And I'm left with questions:

Allison should NOT be in the bottom 3. What is with America? Why has she been there twice? She needed to switch places with Lil. On the 2nd time hearing it back, Lil was very, very off. Painfully so.

What other desserts does the Idol chef make?

Was Scott really playing the piano or was that fake, too, like the singing?

What about the guy with the guitar?

Is Kara going to hate that her little "Boo" routine showed that her arms could use some toning? (I'm one to talk. We could all take lessons from Michelle Obama on the arms).

Could Kris's teeny bopper fans scream any louder?

Why don't we ever see these Ford commercials on TV?

Does Paula really think they all have the same potential as Adam?

How'd they get those bubbles in the piano?

Can she zip that patch shut if she doesn't want to look at something with that eye?

Was she dressed in a party ribbon or metal casings?

Who the heck is she?

(Loved the violin dude with the awesome dreadlocks, though).

Pick a song, any song

Poindexter descends stairs. Judges climb over each other awkwardly to get to their seats. Idols make grand entrance and I say, "What the HECK is she wearing?!?!" well before the judges said it.

I guess the Idols weren't able to visit iTunes headquarters so they visited Ryan's radio studio instead and watched him play with the buttons. Good times.

I like Kara. And holy, Randy finally said what really needed to be said on this show: Just because you like a song doesn't mean you can sing it. I threw a victory punch in the air and yelled, "YES!" when he said that. Something not only coherent, but very, very necessary to say!

Ryan's intros: Stage. Stage. Stools. Stairs. Stairs. Mosh Pit. Stool. Stairs. Stage. Way to mix it up, Idol Producers.

Anoop Desai ("Caught Up" by Usher): Hmmmmmm, vocally, it was good, but the overall performance just okay for me. I need to see more . . . something in his performance. I like him and want to see him do well, but his cocky defensiveness is starting to grate on my nerves. Though I thought it was funny when Kara dissed the Frat Guys and then the camera showed the Frat Guys booing her. Hilarious. And I don't like it when singers pronounce "me" as "may." Tomato. Tomata. It's annoying.

Megan Joy ("Turn Your Lights Down Low" by Bob Marley): What happened to her last name? They dropped it. Corkrey no more. Megan Joy. But Joy is not what I feel when I listen to her. Nausea and discomfort are more along the lines of what I feel. When she sings. And when she overcompensates for her insecurities by lots of winking and head nodding and mouthing the words, "Vote for me!" after she kills (and not in the good say) her song. She isn't in key! And the necklaces and braids didn't help at all. Eric, my best friend in high school, is a huge Marley fan and he got me listening to it all the time. This was an awful thing to do to this song. And I love Paula but even if Megan had a stool, it wouldn't make a difference. It'd just be a really bad song on a "big chair." I'm sick of hearing her saying that she's going to do it next week. Amen, Simon. She's been saying that every week. Enough already.

Danny Gokey ("What Hurts the Most" by Rascall Flatts): Gokey done good. It was a very, very good performance. I love the tone of his voice. Knowing his back story made the song very emotional and believable and moving. He kind of looks like my cousin "Little Johnny" (no lie, that's what we call him even though he's like 30 now). I totally felt like the show started with his performance.

Allison Iraheta ("Don't Speak" by No Doubt): She plays guitar?! Awesome. She chose a good song, but she seemed nervous tonight to me. A little rushed at the beginning while she played with the guitar. Slightly off in parts (but only slightly). But dude, she's SIXTEEN. So if this is an "off night" for her . . . WOW. Her off night is light years ahead of Megan's best performances (assuming we believe she's had any). The judges could've eased up on her outfit, but it really was pretty hideous. I love how she takes it all in stride and laughs it off, though. Amazing talent on this girl. And for those counting at home, Paula has now predicted 3 people into the finale. What is with the female judges and their inability to count?

Scott MacIntyre ("Just The Way You Are" by Billy Joel): He did a fabulous job and it was a very wise choice to not include the band in his performance. I like what he did with the song. It was like Joel meets Manilow. This was Scott's best performance to date even if they did Rick Springfield his hair. And I thought what Paula said about being proud of him was really sweet.

Matt Giraud ("You Found Me" by The Fray): Oh Matt. I so badly want to see Matt do well. But this was not the right kind of song for him. He has so much soul and he really does need to stick to it. I have to say that the judges were right about that. Oh, he looked so nervous from having been in the bottom 3. The song didn't suit him and it sounded way too low for him and he seemed nervous. I know he'd like to be that kind of artist but it's uncomfortable on him. But when he does the soul/R&B stuff . . . wow! That being said, I loved when he went into his false (as usual) and just in general, it would be so very wrong for him to get booted before Megan. So wrong. And I love Kara for saying so.

Lil Rounds ("I Surrender" by Celine Dion): [ sarcasm ] Oh, I am so shocked that she sang a song by a diva like Celine Dion [ /sarcasm ]. You know, I like her hair in the interviews. And then she steps out with extensions or a wig or something and I have to wonder why she doesn't spend as much time choosing a song as she must spend sitting in a salon chair adding to her hair like that. Don't get me wrong. She did okay, but not great. It was very off in many parts. But I AM BORED. I have been bored by her for a long time. She seems to have no idea who she is as an artist. I feel much like Randy on this one--pleading with her to PLEASE do some Mary J. Blige or something . . . anything that might just suit her. The judges constantly say it to her and she smiles and nods and says, "All right. I can do that," and then subjects us to more of the same. Yawn. I'm bored with you now. But she does have way cute little kids. What's with Ryan teaching her child to be violent, though? I'm done with Lil. But not as done as I am with Megan. But it's close.

Adam Lambert ("Play That Funky Music" by Wild Cherry): OMG! OMG! This guys is freaking unbelievable!! I feel like screaming from the rooftops to those who haven't noticed . . . We haven't had an artist like this in well over a decade!!!!!! And it's about time! This guy . . . I mean, think like Freddie Mercury and Axl Rose and Mick Jagger and Steven Tyler and . . . OMG! OMG! He's so so so amazing! How has this guy not been discovered yet?!?!? What the . . . WOW! I LOVE this guy!! I could listen to him 9 times and not hear any others and be very, very happy. This guy is a star. An artist. Has soul. Has rock. Has funk. HOLY Moses. I can't get enough Adam Lambert. He's in a league entirely his own. I miss his rock hair, but other than that, oh baby, it was hot! When he goes into his higher register and "Adam Lamberts" that song . . . WOW! And hello, he sang "Play That Funky Music, White Boy" and that alone should get a standing "O." LOVE this guy. The passion that exudes from him when he performs is unlike anything I've seen in a very long time. And I love it! And he has such a subdued, kind, likeable personality in his interviews and when he gets his critique from the judges. I was chatting with my SIL Jessica today and she totally got what I was saying, so I'll try to express it here, too: It's not that he's good looking, but it's that he's sexy. In the way he performs, carries himself, etc. Adam Lambert is rocking this season of Idol and I dig it.

Kris Allen ("Ain't No Sunshine" by Bill Withers): I love this song. And this arrangment was fabulous. Strings on the stage? With him and the keyboard? Brilliant. And what?! He plays piano, too?? Way to play that card several weeks in. Holy talented and smart! This boy so so SO has swagger. Absolutely no doubt about it. And he has such amazing control of his vocals. He's surprising in his abilities and I like him very much. And he's so cute. Adorable. The boys are SO carrying this whole thing.

From best to worst:

Adam
Kris
Scott
Danny
Allison
Anoop
Matt
Megan
Lil

And I'm okay with that order . . . for the most part. Matt needs to work his way up there and away from those 2 ladies at the bottom of the list.

Who'll be in the bottom 3: Anoop, Megan, Lil
Who'll leave: Lil or Megan . . . oh I don't care which

Top 9 Recap (I Surrender!)

I was all geared up for birth year songs so the very "limited" theme this week threw me for a loop. These nebulous categories are always the worst--more potential train wrecks and plenty of "songs I love." Randy finally articulated what we here at home have been saying for years with this show: just because you like a song doesn't mean you can sing that song. Again, another day at the office for the idols. Kara's counting, Randy's watching paint dry and enjoying people's vocal "prowness," and Paula's talking about furniture. As far as the contestants go, we had a few stand-outs, some solids, a disappointment or two, and a "why, oh why am I subjected to this." You can all decide which performances fit into which categories, but as Simon would say, you can disagree with me but you would be wrong.

Anoop: A disappointment for me. I didn't know the song, but I knew Usher would be one of those "don't do it" kind of moments. Anoop picked a song he likes, but not one that performs well on Idol. And I'll agree with Stacy ahead of time (because I know she's going to say it)--he's getting a little arrogant in his defensiveness. He's been yanked around a lot through the weeks, but something not good has happened along the way. Maybe it's because the Indian kid is referring to himself as a brother and talking about his homies.

Megan Joy: She can't even pick a good one-name name. First she's Megan Corkrey, then Megan Joy Corkrey, and now just Megan Joy. A rose by any other name . . . I honestly don't get it. Even though she didn't pick the Marley song I feared she would ("I Shot the Sheriff") it was still the wrong song (obviously). First, it was out of tune from start to finish. Second, the lyrics actually say "I died," which is not a great choice given the karma of the lyrics. And third, she really isn't a very good singer in the end. Adequate at times, but nothing spectacular. I almost tire of even commenting on her performances, but apparently can't help myself. (And now Stacy is watching a second time to refresh her memory. How lucky am I?!)

Danny: This guy is the real deal. He's got a recognizable sound and great musical ability. One thing that is impressive to me is that despite the emotional heartbreak he has to still carry he has not once (that I can remember) used that to garner votes or sympathy. Really, we know about it because American Idol has used that footage during audition weeks ad nauseum. He's like a man on a mission.

Allison: So she plays guitar, too? Very nice. She has the entire rocker persona down. I'm a little frustrated the judges really made the wardrobe the focus tonight, although I agree it was not a good selection! Her performance was solid, but not great. She is proving she is a force and I hope she continues to get the credit she deserves. And Paula used the word "ax" tonight. Very cool.

Scott: That he would pick a Billy Joel song was not a difficult prediction. It was, in fact, a perfect selection, including going solo on the piano. He doesn't have the greatest voice, but it is very good. And, Scott knows exactly how to play to his strengths. Big props to him for stepping up his game and bringing it this week after a disappointing last week (how's that for three overdone Idol phrases?).

Matt: This was a bad week for Matt so I'm glad Kara tried to come to his rescue. No way he deserves to go home based on his performances as a whole, and not even based on tonight's. He's got to stop choosing songs he likes (a la Megan) and choose the songs that fit him. When he's an established artist he can start to branch out and experiment. For now he has to focus on his "natural" genre, which is toward the R&B side of things. An upside to his performance--I liked how he started in the crowd. Very interesting.

Lil: I'm so shocked Lil picked a diva song. And I'm also so shocked that it came off as less impressive than she thought. Have people learned nothing yet from this show? Not one winner of the show has been a classic diva. A few have had the big voice necessary to pull off songs by Celene Dion, but the winners have found ways to win without resorting to these predictable choices.

Adam: Funky white boy indeed! Ka-ching go the producers. Adam is going to do very well for himself. I feel like I say the same thing over and over again, but Adam is the most current and unique contestant this year, and he's unique in a good way, not in a nasally, what in the world is she doing with her arms, Megan Joy kind of way (sorry, I had to get one more shot in).

Kris: Now he plays the piano. A triple threat! His arrangement was great and I loved the whole performance. I may have even liked it better than Adam in a less obvious kind of way. As a musician Kris is definitely one of the most deserving of all of the contestants this year. I only hope his understated confidence and personality don't get lost in the shuffle.

BOTTOM THREE: Megan Joy, Lil, Matt
LEAVING IDOL TO TRY HER LUCK ON "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE": Megan Joy